Mid-life crisis?

Ok so maybe more like a quarter life crisis?
 I know I'm practically a baby with a great life that shouldn't be in any sort of crisis right?!
 I don't get what my deal is lately, It's like I accidentally sat on the "remote" of life hit fast-forward / skipped several chapters and now the movie life I just sat down to watch is almost over and 
I'm ONLY 24!!! 
We're done having kids -yes that's official and no we won't be changing our minds. -Believe me it's not at all what I planned for. 
Cole's done with school and in a career.
 I'm THE ONLY stay-at-home mom in Gunnison and I can't even tell you how frustrating/discouraging/difficult/lonely that has been!! Especially after being in Eagle Mountain :( which is the first place IN MY LIFE that has felt like home.
 I haven't felt so out of place since I moved to Nevada with my parents -and that only lasted a couple weeks! 
I have NO CLUE what I'm doing here! 
I like the people and everything -but don't tell me this is a great place to raise a family 
-this is a great place to live but it is SSSOOOO NOT family oriented it's work oriented -which is fine 
-IF YOU WORK! 
I've had the flu for the past couple weeks and I'm DONE with being cooped up I think I just might go crazy! The only problem is that Grey is now sick and I'm not one of those moms that like to go spreadin the wealth -believe me my temp was like 104.2 for quite a few days 
it was AWFUL
 I'm not wishin that on anyone. So we will remain shut-ins until we can all be certain that we are over it 
-and then probably until April so we can make sure we wont have to go through this again! 
-grumble grumble grumble gripe gripe gripe-
Where did my positive attitude run off and hide?
It'll probably come out tomorrow smiling and ready for a new week 
but right at this moment it's lost somewhere in this germ infested mess of a person I call 
-me

Comments

The Eldredge's said…
I'm sorry sissy!! You will feel better soon. Being sick always gets people down in the dumps! The sun will come out tomorrow!! LOL!! Love you lots!! Call me if you need to chat!! Miss you!!
February 26, 2011 at 10:02 PM
Hess said…
I love your honest emotions, it normalizes this life we live in. We all feel like we want the garbage disposal to ingulf us at times, ok, maybe that is just me on my favorite days;). Tomorrow is always a better day I don't know why, but it is. I always think it is because I can put my kids to bed and relaxe for a few hours. Eagle Mountain was a great place, great people. Just remind yourself how, looooong of a drive it was to get home from anywhere. Maybe, that will make you not miss it as much;)!
February 26, 2011 at 11:03 PM
Jessica Newman said…
You said it yourself... You are ONLY 24! It can be so hard to be shut inside all day long especially with sick kiddos! I know you are feeling alone, but you are never alone. Focus on your family but include them in the activities that make you happiest. We all have hard things, but we can do hard things. I hope you do feel better tomorrow. Don't give into the sad. We are here to have joy. You can do it. You can be a stay at home mom in Gunnison and be happy. Ask Heavenly Father to help you feel good about your work on the earth. You are doing amazing things.
February 27, 2011 at 2:42 PM
Anonymous said…
Let's switch places...I live around all stay at home moms and wish there was more working moms around to make me less jealous! Or I should just get to stay home! LOL - sorry you are going through this time - I hope you can find some good people eventually down there so you can enjoy it! Or just move back up here!!! And I wish I could come play with you!
February 27, 2011 at 4:39 PM
JBandJess said…
Hello their neighbor (well old one) Sorry things have been crazy and lonely. You're not alone with being sock though, Konnor and Justin were sick, now Jack is sick, now I'm just waiting for it to take ahold of me. But, sometime this spring/summer you will have to come back to Eagle Mountain and we can have aBBQ with everyone, like old times. Plus, we need to come out and see you guys. Try to stay positive. This dreadful winter will soon be over and you can be your happy go lucky outdoorsy self again.
February 27, 2011 at 9:12 PM
Mom / Nannies said…
I'm glad that you are doing better now! It is the pits to be sick and cooped up. I know how it is to be one of the few who are stay at home mom's. When we lived in Magna, Marilyn and I were some of the very few and so I was lucky to have her.

I'm sure you'll find a few more eventually, maybe you can pray for some to move in. Love ya tons!
April 5, 2011 at 3:52 AM
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